Celebrating Father’s Day in Adoption
When thinking about some of the most important people in your life, many times moms take the cake. But what an unparalleled impact a great dad can make in the life of a child. This Father’s Day, let’s celebrate fathers, fathers-to-be, hopeful fathers, and men who take on the role of fathers. Let’s reinforce the importance of the title father and, by our encouragement and admiration, incite a fervency in the worth of a father. No matter what specifics make him a father, figure out the best way to celebrate him this holiday.
For a father who has identified the desire to be a parent in his heart but the dream hasn’t quite come full circle yet, this holiday can be sad and stressful. No doubt that just last month he was comforting the hopeful mother who felt cheated out of Mother’s Day celebration. Her vulnerability and emotions can sometimes more easily be seen. But trying to deal with your own emotions and at the same time show strength for your spouse can be a struggle for some. Your honesty with each other is one of the best things you can do, even on days when you grieve. Support one another in the good times and the not-so-good. On top of sharing with one another, you can spend time together where you enjoy one another’s company and take the focus for a day off of infertility or adoption or the waiting to refresh each other.
Fathers of adopted children have a precious view of fatherhood and the unique path you walked. Not only can you celebrate with your loved ones and those who call you ‘dad,’ but you share a connection, whether you are acquainted or not, to a birth father of your child. You may not have a relationship with your child’s birth father, but having a representation of his impact on your celebration of Father’s Day is important for you and your child. No one outside of your position can fully understand the feelings you possess, but without your child’s birth father, your day would look a lot different. Make it a special focus this holiday celebration to communicate your passion as a father to your child and the gratitude for a man who also made it possible.
When a child needs extra attention or a father appreciates having all hands on deck from others who love their child, men who take on roles as “surrogate” fathers have supplemental duties and hardly get any of the praise. A close uncle or grandfather, a teacher or coach, a family friend, or a willing neighbor — fathers can all look very different and play vital parts in a child’s life. The generosity and sacrifice of men who step into a role like this deserve acknowledgment and esteem. Show him your appreciation.
If you are an experienced father and identify with the way Father’s Day celebrations have evolved over the years with the stages in your life, the best thing you can do this holiday is to encourage and support a dad or hopeful dad who can be comforted by your wisdom. Throughout each of life’s phases, a day like Father’s Day takes on new meaning and points toward the journey you’re taking. Be mindful of what new perception you see this Father’s Day and celebrate with those you love.
Jill is a 32-year-old wife and mom. She has been married to her husband, Brannon, for eight years and has 5-year-old and 1-year-old daughters. Jill and her husband are currently in the adoption process to bring another baby into their home. Jill lives in a small community in Kentucky. She has her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology and Spanish and obtained her Master’s degree in Christian Ministries. Jill’s passions are her faith, her family, writing, playing sports, and eating good food.