Does a Kid Forget their Birth Parents After Adoption?

Making the choice to place your child for adoption is a selfless, but difficult decision. Even if you know it’s what’s best for you and them, saying goodbye is never easy.

You know that they’ll be well taken care of with the family you chose for them. But you might not be sure what your life will look like going forward. You might be wondering “Does a kid forget their birth parents after adoption?”

No. You’re not alone in wondering this. This is a common concern of many first-time birth mothers. But we’re here to assure you that your child will never forget about you. With most adoptions today being open adoptions, you will be able to be as involved in your child’s live as you feel comfortable doing so.

If you’re worried about your child forgetting you following the adoption or have questions about open adoption, you can reach out to an adoption professional today to get the answers you need.

What is Open Adoption?

In an open adoption, the birth mother is able to have ongoing contact with the adoptive family and her child, even after the adoption is complete. Most adoptions today are open adoptions. Studies have shown that this style of adoption is the most beneficial for everyone involved.

In previous decades, adoptions were predominately closed. Closed adoptions meant birth parents would never know where their child ended up, and all identifying information would be sealed. This was because of the negative stigma that was still associated with adoption at this time. Now, adoption is viewed as something to be celebrated.

If you choose to have an open adoption, there will be an open line of communication between your child and their adoptive family. This post-placement contact could be in the form of:

• Texts
• Calls
• Emails
• Video chat
• In-person visits

The type of contact you’re interested in and the frequency will always be up to you.

Semi Open Adoption

Semi open adoption is a style of adoption that allows you to indirectly stay in touch with your child. You’re able to stay up to date on your child’s life, but all contact is mediated by an adoption professional. That way, you’ll never have to wonder what happened to your child but you’re able to take some space to heal. And if at any point, you decide you want a fully open adoption, this is always an option for you.

How You Can Stay Involved in Your Child’s Life

With your child being raised by someone else, it can be hard not to worry about them forgetting about you. This will never happen. That’s because, no matter what, you will always be their parent and hero. You made a brave sacrifice to give them the life you want them to have.

There are things you can do to ensure you are remaining a part of your child’s life.

1. Choose the Level of Contact

How do you want your relationship with the adoptive family to look? You might choose to have a one or two in-person visits a year, or you may prefer to receive updates over the phone or social media. This choice will always be yours and will included in your adoption plan.

2. Choose a Family Who Wants the Same Level of Contact

As the birth mother, you will be able to choose the adoptive family.  When you look through adoptive family profiles with your adoption specialist, you will be able to find out how much future contact they’re open to with their child’s birth parents. Many will be open to visits, or other forms of contact.

In fact, some adoption agencies require that all adoptive families they work with to be open to some form of contact with the birth mother.

3. Share Information About Yourself with the Adoptive Family

Tell the adoptive family that you chose all about yourself. That way, they’ll be able to share this information with your child. It’s important that adopted children know about their birth parents. The more information you provide, the more your closure your child will have.

They’ll be able to know more about where they came from and how their adoption came to be. If they were adopted at an early age, they can ask their adoptive parents questions they may have about you.

4. Stay in Touch.

Whether it’s through calls, emails, social media or pictures, staying connected with your child in this day and age has never been easier. It’s a great way to make sure that your child will know who you are, and a way to stay involved in their life. Your child will never forget about you, or the gift you gave them.

You will never have to worry about your child forgetting you. You will always be a part of their life in ways big and small. To get more guidance about how to be involved in your child’s life after adoption, reach out to an adoption professional today.