There are thousands of sayings about waiting. It is “the hardest part.” But do remember that “good things come to those wait.” When you’re waiting to adopt a child, words of wisdom aren’t the only things you’ll need to help you keep your mind off the days ahead. Once you’ve completed all the paperwork, home visits, and interviews, it’s time to, well, wait. Try not to let the upcoming adoption consume you, though. Here are some things you may want to do to keep your mind off the waiting.
Enjoy date nights – once you have a new child in your life, finding time to get out and do things with your spouse will be tricky. Take advantage of not needing a sitter now. Enjoy dinner out at a nice restaurant or take in a late movie.
Focus on yourself – along with enjoying uninterrupted time with your spouse, spend some quality time with yourself. Read books, exercise, develop a hobby, relax. These activities will keep your mind off the waiting. Your new arrival will be the center of your world for years to come. Pamper yourself now so you’re rested and ready for your new family member.
Prepare the child’s bedroom – when the adoption seems imminent, start getting your child’s room ready. Take stock of what you have, and makes plans to either purchase or borrow what you still need. Once you know the child’s age and/or sex, you can start shopping for fun things — cute clothes, stuffed animals, toys. Keep in mind that you may be the guest of honor at a baby shower, so don’t go overboard. Channel the urge to purchase into creating a gift registry.
Choose a name – you don’t need to make a final decision until you meet your child, but definitely come up with a short list of name choices.
Read parenting and adoption books – the list of books on these topics is endless. Ask family and friends for their recommendations, or check out a few from the local library.
Get your affairs in order – update your health insurance, and create a will or edit an existing one. Explore your and/or your spouse’s “adoption leave” policy.
Choose a pediatrician – depending on where you live, the choices can range from one doctor to 500 doctors. Ask friends and family for recommendations, and make appointments to visit the offices of your top choices. Do your research.
Explore child care options, if necessary – like choosing a pediatrician, get recommendations from family and friends. Make appointments to visit all facilities in the running for the final selection.
Keep a journal – not only will this be a loving keepsake for your child, but it may help keep your emotions in check. The waiting period is often overloaded with feelings of hope, fear, excitement, frustration and anxiety. Recording your thoughts on paper can often be freeing.
It is easy to get frustrated during the wait for your child. Try to maintain a normal schedule, but allow yourself to get excited too. The waiting will not last forever, and your new journey will soon begin.