What Birth Mothers Look for in Adoption Profiles – Thoughts from a Birth Mother

I’ll never forget looking at the profiles of prospective adoptive parents that my adoption agent provided me with. My son was 6 months old at the time, and I was very specific about what I was looking for with potential adoptive parents for him. It turns out, the profile I picked ended up being the perfect match for my son and me.

What stood out to me the most about the adoptive parents’ profile was their obvious genuineness. I needed to find a prospective adoptive couple that I trusted, and that meant that I needed them to be genuine from the start. Prospective birth mothers may all be looking for different specifics in potential adoptive parent profiles, but we are also all looking for a potential adoptive couple that we can trust with our child.

Creating Genuineness and Trust with a Prospective Adoptive Family Profile

As a potential adoptive parent, you may be wondering how to create an adoption profile that will stand out to a birth mother.

The first and most important tip for your profile is this: Be genuine.

Prospective birth mothers may be looking for something specific, but most importantly, we are interested in who you are. Perhaps you believe in a specific religion, but you are compassionate to other beliefs. The compassion you show in your profile will mean more to a prospective birth mother than the religious beliefs themselves. No matter what you decide you want to share about yourself, make sure you share it in a heartfelt way.

Tips for Creating Your Adoptive Family Profile

• Choose pictures that reveal your true nature. Instead of posing for these pictures, just engage in an activity you enjoy and have someone take pictures while you are doing it. The best picture I remember seeing of my son’s parents had them smiling so big. I could tell by their smiles in their photo how genuine they were being.
• Don’t be afraid to be unique and maybe even a little bold. There is something special about all of us. It could be that we have a certain personality trait, enjoy a rather random activity, or have other personal experiences or talents to share. Whatever it is, don’t be afraid to include something like this in your profile. Maybe for you, adding a little humor is something that’s unique to your profile. Or, perhaps you have a special talent you would like a prospective birth mother to know about. When the right prospective birth mother sees that profile, she will enjoy your transparency and openness with her.
• Make sure what’s important to you is communicated in your adoptive parent profile. For example, if you have family values or traditions that you hold dear, make sure to include them. Maybe you believe in the value of hard work, education, kindness, etc. Let your birth mother see who you are through your adoptive family profile.
• Take time alone to think about what the overall picture you want to convey looks like. Don’t rush creating an adoptive parent profile. It’s important that adoptive parents are matched with their perfect birth mother as best as possible. The best way to ensure a successful match is to present a profile that is genuine and considered.

Every birth mother may be looking for something different, but honesty and transparency are the most important pieces of the puzzle for her. She wants to know that her child will be in good hands, and that your environment matches the one she is looking for her child. Don’t be afraid to get creative with your adoption profile if it suits your personalities. Traditional values may mean a more traditional profile. Whatever the picture being painted looks like, use the adoption profile to achieve it. Adoptive parent profiles should be fun to create and exciting to view.

Good luck on your search, adoptive parents! I know the right birth mother is out there for you all, so hang tight and be patient!

-Lindsay Arielle

Lindsay is a guest blogger for Considering Adoption. She placed her son for adoption 7 years ago and hopes to use her experience to support and educate other expectant mothers considering adoption, as well as adoptive families.