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How Adoption is an Option When Pregnant and Getting a Divorce

Circumstances in life can make the prospect of parenting a child seems impossible. This includes going through a divorce while pregnant. Thankfully, adoption is always an option. 

Getting divorced can be one of the most stressful experiences in a person’s life. However, if you are pregnant and getting a divorce, you have several options for your baby. 

Because getting divorced while pregnant adds a new layer of complications to an already messy situation, contacting a trusted and experienced adoption agency can give you information on how an adoption creates a better situation for everyone involved. 

To get more information on how an adoption agency can give you hope for a better future, complete our form online and speak with an adoption specialist today. You can get answers to any questions you have about choosing adoption when pregnant and getting a divorce. 

How Choosing Adoption is always an Option for You 

Your first thought might be that you have to parent this baby or end the pregnancy. Or, you might be asking: “Can you put a baby up for adoption while in a divorce?” The answer is yes. An adoption is always an option for an expectant mother, even if you are going through a divorce while pregnant.  

This is a complex situation, and there are plenty of things to consider. Only you can know what is best for you, and you should keep your best interests, and the best interests of your baby, as priorities. 

If you decide you want to “give up” your baby for adoption while going through a divorce, you might be asking, “I want to give up my baby for adoption and going through a divorce, what are my rights and what are the birth father’s rights?”  

Because state laws regarding a father’s rights in adoption vary, we encourage you to contact an adoption professional to learn more.  

An adoption specialist can explain what the legal requirements are in your situation and if you decide adoption is right for you and your baby, help you move forward with an adoption plan that is best for you

In this difficult situation, you have options to consider. Adoption is a choice that could benefit everyone involved, including a hopeful adoptive family waiting for the chance to adopt a child. Keeping your child and co-parenting is also an option.  

Only you can decide what is best for your baby. Here are some things to consider when deciding on keeping your baby: 

Should I Keep My Baby While Divorcing? 

There are many ways a woman can find herself pregnant and divorcing. Situations could include not knowing you’re pregnant when deciding on divorce. Maybe you became pregnant with another man during a divorce.  

Whatever the circumstances, when you discover that you’re pregnant during the middle of divorce proceedings, it can add another emotional complication to an already stressful process. A common dilemma in this situation is how to tell the father about the pregnancy and whether you should keep your baby. 

When you complete this form, you will quickly get connected to an experienced adoption specialist that can give you information on talking to the father of your child and how adoption could be the answer. Even if you haven’t fully committed to adoption, an adoption specialist can talk to you about how to have a conversation about your pregnancy with the father. 

If you’re thinking about keeping your baby, consider these questions: 

What is best for Your Baby? 

While you are the only one who can make this decision, we encourage you to think about one important thing — what is best for your baby. A baby should never be used as a fix for a failing marriage. While a child may seem like the sort of bonding experience needed to repair the relational damage that has led to this divorce while pregnant, this is not a healthy way to approach things.  

The relationship between you and your partner is hard enough already; adding a child to the mix will only complicate things further. 

Are You Ready to Be a Single Parent? 

If you’re asking, “Should I keep my baby while divorcing?” you should also consider the realities of single parenting. If your husband is the father of your baby, he may be obligated to pay child support after your divorce — but you will still need to consider the financial aspects of raising a child on your own, as well as things like childcare and a support system for you as a single parent.  

While you are coping with divorce while pregnant, you may see your unborn child as a “replacement” for the loved one you are losing, but remember this — a child should not have the pressure of being there to make you feel better. Your responsibility as their parent will be to make them feel loved and supported, despite your feelings. 

“Giving Up” Your Baby for Adoption to Save Your Marriage 

If you are pregnant and getting a divorce, you likely have a complicated history with your spouse, especially if he is your baby’s father. There is a good chance he will have an opinion about whether or not you should place your child for adoption.  

Think about what will be best for you and the baby moving forward. Do you want to sustain your relationship, even if you know your marriage won’t provide a loving environment for your child? While you may need to involve your spouse in the adoption plans, using a child to “save” a marriage can further complicate your circumstances and have the opposite intended impact on your marriage and the health of your environment for a child 

If your marriage is suffering and you are pregnant, adoption can be the option that not only gives your child a better future but helps you and your husband focus on whether or not you can repair your relationship. 

Janelle and her husband became pregnant at a time when their marriage was struggling. Parenting felt impossible, leading to the choice of adoption. 

“It was super tough at first, but I knew it was what needed to happen, that we weren’t in the right place and it wasn’t the right environment to bring two babies into,” she said. “[There was] no hesitation going into the adoption process… I already loved the babies, even though they weren’t born, and I knew that’s what they needed. 

“For me, there was no question after I made that decision.” 

If you are feeling the pressure of getting divorced with a baby on the way, remember that you always have the right to seek support and explore your unplanned pregnancy options. For more information about putting a baby up for adoption and divorce, please contact an adoption professional

Choosing Adoption When You Are Pregnant and Divorcing 

Single parenting is possible but difficult. If this path isn’t the answer for you, remember that you have another option: adoption. Yes, a woman can choose adoption while in a divorce. The process may be a bit more complex if the situation with the baby’s birth father is complicated, but that should never stop you from exploring this option. Adoption may offer the best chance at a good life for your baby.  

Many hopeful adoptive parents would be overjoyed to provide a stable, two-parent household with parents who are committed to loving and supporting your child. Choosing adoption is not “giving away” or “giving up” your baby, but it is giving him or her the chance at a life you may not be able to provide yourself. This is a decision based on love and it makes you a hero. 

You will have the same rights as any prospective birth mother if you choose adoption while pregnant and divorcing. You have the right to create an adoption plan that is best for you, including choosing adoptive parents for your baby and having an open adoption relationship with them and your child after the adoption.  

Because birth father rights in adoption can be especially complicated during a divorce process, you will need to work with an experienced adoption specialist to learn what laws apply in your situation. 

An adoption professional is always available to talk you through your options if you are going through a divorce while pregnant, including the steps of the process if you want to give a baby up for adoption while going through a divorce, your rights, and the birth father’s rights in this process. You can speak with an adoption specialist when you complete our contact form