When an expectant mother considers adoption for her baby, she is coming from a place of love. Even though it’s common to hear people talk about “giving a baby up” for adoption — maybe you have even used this language yourself — there’s really no part of adoption that is “giving up.” It’s doing something brave that gives a child a chance at a great life.
That’s why the answer to this question matters. Any expectant mother cares deeply about what happens to her baby, which is why you may be asking, “What happens if I don’t find an adoptive family by the time by son’s born?”
You may be farther along in your pregnancy and feel like time is running out on adoption, and this is causing concern about finding an adoptive family. Can parents give children up for adoption before someone wants them? What if I don’t have an adoptive family picked when I give birth?
These are good questions to ask, and the answer is good news for you and your baby.
It’s Never Too Late to Find Adoptive Parents
You can choose adoption at any point during your pregnancy and even after birth. When you choose adoption, you will need to work with an adoption agency that will guide you through the process and help you complete a successful adoption. This is the case no matter when you choose adoption.
If you choose adoption at any point during your pregnancy, you will have the time to find an adoptive family with the help of the social worker from your adoption agency. When choosing adoption at the hospital, there will obviously be less time. Still, it’s never too late.
If you’re asking, “What if I don’t have an adoptive family picked when I give birth?” the good news is that you can still choose an adoptive family after your baby is born.
How to Find an Adoptive Family
It’s not your job to find the right adoptive family for your baby; it’s just your job to pick the best one. If you’re wondering what happens if you don’t find an adoptive family by the time your son or daughter is born, you’ll be relieved to hear that your adoption agency is the one who finds the family. With the help of a social worker, you’ll take three basic steps to choose the right adoptive parents for your baby.
Step 1: Decide what type of family you would like to adopt your baby.
Work out character traits or other details you’re looking for in an adoptive family with your social worker. Consider questions like:
- Do I want my child to live in an urban or rural environment?
- Do I want the parents to be members of a particular faith or religion?
- Do I want my child to have siblings?
What you decide will dictate the adoptive family profiles your social worker puts together for you.
Step 2: View adoption profiles and pick the right family.
This step will differ slightly depending on which adoption agency you are working with. Based on your preferences in step one, your social worker will compile profiles of adoptive families. You will be able to look at several different families, and then you can choose the family you think is right. No matter if you are early in your pregnancy, late in your pregnancy or already at the hospital, you can still choose the adoptive family, and there will be families who want to adopt your baby.
Step 3: Get to know the adoptive family.
Most domestic infant adoption today are at least semi-open, which means that after you choose the adoptive parents, you will have a chance to get to know them. This helps many expectant mothers feel confident in their decision.
While you are thinking about this process, it’s also a good time to consider which type of adoption agency you want to work with. There are different types of agencies, and each has unique benefits. A local adoption agency will offer you face-to-face interaction with your social worker, while a national adoption agency will give you more families to choose from. You can decide which type of agency will be best for you.
What Happens if Nobody Adopts my Baby?
Babies don’t go un-adopted in domestic infant adoption. At any moment, there are many more hopeful adoptive parents than prospective birth mothers. Adoption agencies across the country work with thousands of hopeful parents each year, and you will be able to choose a family who wants to adopt your baby. Even if you don’t have an adoptive family picked out when you give birth, there is still time to choose one.
If you’re thinking, “Wait, I know I’ve heard stories about children who were not adopted,” you are most likely thinking of stories from the foster care system. In foster to adopt situations, it is true that there are children who will wait many years to find the right adoptive family. But when you choose adoption for your baby, even after you’ve given birth, your baby will not enter the foster care system.
As long as you contact an adoption agency and ask to place your baby through domestic infant adoption, there will be a family who cannot wait to adopt your baby.