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I Don't Want My Baby – Are These Thoughts Real or Fleeting?

If you are having feelings of not wanting your baby, you are not alone. Countless pregnant mothers feel the same way, and it’s important to determine if these feelings are serious and should be acted upon or treated in some other way.
Here, you can find some of the common reasons women in your position may experience feelings of not wanting their baby, and whether they are just feelings or true signs that adoption may be considered.


Antenatal and postpartum depression affect a large number of mothers every year, causing some of them to wonder if they are prepared and even excited to raise a child. If this describes you, seeking the proper treatment to address these symptoms may allow you to see your pregnancy from a different perspective.

Consider reaching out to a doctor if you are experiencing any of the following symptoms:

  • Chronic anxiety
  • Mood swings
  • Change in appetite or sleep habits
  • Inability to concentrate
  • Irritability
  • Lack of energy
  • Inability to concentrate
  • Frequent crying

Depression is a serious clinical illness, and you do not want to make an important decision under its influence.

Unfavorable Home Environment

It’s important for a child to be raised in a healthy and happy household. Some women may feel that their household isn’t fully prepared for the introduction of a child into their lives for the following reasons:

  • A single-parent home – For some people, raising a child in a two-parent household is a must, and you may not be in a position to raise your baby with the father.
  • Unhealthy relationships – Some home environments may have complicated or unhealthy family dynamics, and you may not want to expose a baby to those relationships.
  • Low income – The most common reason that women consider alternatives to parenting is finances. The financial burden of adding a child to the family may appear too great, and the child may not receive as many opportunities as you would prefer.

While these may be reasons you are experiencing feelings of not wanting your baby, it’s important to remember each of these scenarios can change over time.

For example, the child’s father may not be in the picture, but it is very likely you will find another partner who would love to assume the role of “dad” to your child. And if not, there are countless awesome single mothers out there raising happy children.

And your finances can easily change as well. Ask any family how they absorbed the additional financial needs of having children, and they will all say the same thing: “We just figured out a way to make it work.”

Whatever you do, don’t make a rash decision based on your family situation without careful consideration on how things may improve in the future.

Unfinished Goals

Maybe you have thought about having kids one day, but now that the day has arrived, you may feel unsure about whether now is the right time. Whether you are in the middle of your education or on a particular career path, becoming a parent has the potential to put your current aspirations on hold.

Now, of course you can continue to pursue your career goals while being pregnant and later when raising a child, but it will be a lot of work. Are you ready to take on this challenge, or are you prepared to delay your education or career goals? If not, and if you simply don’t feel ready to assume the most important job of all – motherhood – perhaps looking further into an alternative like adoption is the best-case scenario.

Lack of Desire to Parent

Finally, there is the scenario of whether you even want to, or have ever wanted to, become a mom. Is that reason enough to place a baby for adoption?

Some people know from an early age that they do not want to be parents. Others decide later in life that their careers, personal relationships or other goals are more important to them than having children.

However, this does not mean that they are no longer prone to an unplanned pregnancy. For many women in this position, adoption allows them to pursue the life they want to live while ensuring that their child grows up in a loving home. This is an important, soul-searching topic that you must address before committing to parenthood.

As you can see, there are many reasons you may wonder if you are truly ready to raise a child. Hopefully, this article has highlighted whether they are truly reasons to consider alternatives to parenting or if they are just fleeting feelings that don’t necessarily indicate your readiness to become a great mother to your baby.