9 Months Pregnant – Is it Still Possible to Choose Adoption?
The big day is almost here, and we bet that you’re a ball of nerves and anticipation. Depending on your situation, you might still be asking, “What happens when you’re 37, 38 or 39 weeks pregnant and still don’t want the baby?”
It would be an understatement to say a woman considering her options late in her unplanned pregnancy is probably feeling overwhelmed. But, there’s some good news. You still have a few options available when you’re facing an unplanned pregnancy at 9 months. Whether you’re having a baby in two weeks and want to give them up for adoption or you’re anxiously excited to meet your little one, here’s everything you should know.
Your Baby’s Development at 9 Months
Wow, nine months really do fly by. Congratulations, you’re almost there! Whether you’re 37 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby or 39 weeks pregnant and excited to finally bring your child home, here’s what you should know about your baby’s development in the last couple of weeks.
- 36 Weeks: If you haven’t taken a child birthing class, now would be a great time to do so — even if you’re 36 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby (or simply don’t feel ready to parent). Now that you’re in the end of the third trimester, the baby could come any day, which means it’s a great time to get prepared just in case they arrive ahead of schedule, regardless of which unplanned pregnancy option you choose.
As your due date approaches, you may also find that your feelings about your pregnancy options are starting to change. If you were planning to parent up until this point, but you’re now 36 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby anymore, consider reaching out to a professional for support. An unplanned pregnancy counselor can help you sort through your feelings and determine whether you’re experiencing normal pre-birth nerves or if you should seriously consider adoption.
- 37 Weeks: There’s never a bad time for a cleaning spree! Now that it’s almost time to meet baby, you might have the sudden urge to start nesting. You might also start experiencing symptoms that could be confused with labor, like heartburn, spotting and abdominal pressure.
If you’re 37 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby, your nesting spree might look a little different. Instead of preparing to bring your baby home, you could start preparing an adoption plan for them. If you haven’t already, consider reaching out to an adoption professional to discuss your adoption preferences and start searching for an adoptive family.
- 38 Weeks: Now that you’re at 38 weeks, your baby is probably sitting pretty low in your pelvis. Keep looking out for signs of early labor over the next couple of weeks but try not to stress out too much. You’re probably already having a hard-enough time sleeping enough as it is.
If you are 38 weeks pregnant and want to give the baby for adoption, now is a good time to start finalizing the details of your adoption and hospital plans. If you haven’t started creating an adoption plan, reach out to an adoption professional this week to begin the process.
- 39 Weeks: We know that you’re getting anxious now that baby is almost here. If you’re 39 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby, you are probably also feeling relieved that your pregnancy will end any day now! Continue to keep an eye out for signs of labor.
If you are 39 weeks pregnant and want to “give up” the baby for adoption, an adoption professional can help you put the plans in place to do so. At 39 weeks of pregnancy, thinking of adoption can feel overwhelming, but your adoption specialist can guide you through every step. Remember, it’s never too late to choose adoption, and your adoption agency can complete the process as quickly as you need.
- 40 Weeks: You’re finally at the finish line! The baby should arrive around this week, but try not to stress out too much while you wait for their arrival. Continue getting all of your last-minute items ready, like the hospital bag, and make sure your car is ready for when you have to head out at a moment’s notice. If you’re not thinking about parenting, now would be a good time to learn more about the adoption process at 40 weeks.
It’s never too late to begin the adoption process, even after you go into labor or after your baby is born. But, if you know this is the best option for you, starting the process now can put your mind at ease when the big day comes — that way, all you have to worry about when you get to the hospital is having a safe labor and delivery experience.
Your Unplanned Pregnancy Options at 9 Months
Your due date is getting closer every day. At this point, you have two unplanned pregnancy options to consider: adoption and parenting. To start, here’s a little bit of information about both.
Many women who are 36, 38 or 40 weeks pregnant and want to give a baby up for adoption wonder if it’s too late. The answer to that question will always be no. Adoption is always an option for you and your baby. Whether you’re 37 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby, or 39 weeks pregnant and unsure which option is best for you, here’s what you should know about the steps involved in choosing adoption late into your pregnancy.
Step 1: Find an adoption professional. Once you find an adoption agency that feels right, give them a call. If you’re 36–39 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby, a trained specialist will go over all of your options with absolutely no cost or obligation to choose adoption.
Step 2: Create an adoption plan. During this step, your assigned specialist will ask you some detailed questions about your hopes for an adoption. This will include what you’re looking for from an adoptive family, how much contact you’re open to, what you want the hospital stay to look like, and more. All of these questions will create an adoption plan that’s made just for you.
Step 3: Find the perfect adoptive parents and get to know them: At 9 months pregnant, you’re probably asking, “Is it possible to find adoptive parents within one to three weeks?” Of course. No matter where you’re at in your pregnancy, there are countless families ready to meet you.
Once you have an idea of what you’re looking for in a family, your adoption specialist will start sending you adoptive family profiles until you find the perfect one. Once you do, it’s time to start getting to know them through texts, phone calls, emails, and even a visit at the hospital when your baby is born.
Step 4: Create a hospital plan and get ready for placement. With the help of your adoption specialist, you can start creating a hospital plan. During the adoption process at 40 weeks, you’ll be able to decide:
- Which members of your support system will be with you at the hospital
- Who will be the first one to hold your baby
- If you want to leave the hospital before or after your baby
- And more
The next part of your hospital stay will be to sign the consent to adoption and terminate your parental rights. How long you’ll have to wait until you can sign this document will depend on which state you live in. The most important thing to remember is that once you sign your consent to the adoption, that’s it. You won’t be able to change your mind or get your baby back. Your adoption attorney will go over your rights before you get to this step, but it’s important to make sure you’re completely sure before this happens.
Step 5: Get ready for life after adoption. The end of an adoption can be the start of a beautiful relationship. One of the best things about open and semi-open adoption is that you never have to say goodbye forever. There are many birth parents who, at 36–39 weeks and thinking of adoption, are open to contact through picture and letters, phone calls, emails, and in-person visit. No matter what you’re comfortable with, your adoption specialist will work with you to create a perfect post-adoption contact plan.
If you’re considering adoption, and you’re 36 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby, it’s never too late to contact an agency and learn more about your options.
Now that it’s your last month of pregnancy, everything you need to bring your baby home should be just about wrapped up. If you haven’t, now is the time pack what you need in your hospital bag. Make sure to check your list twice so that you don’t forget anything.
If you’re just now thinking of parenting, then you’ll have a bit of work to catch up. Reach out to your support system to see if they can help you get everything you need to get ready for baby. We’re sure they’ll be more than happy to help.
What Happens if the Baby Arrives Early?
Babies aren’t always known for staying on schedule. As the prospective birth mother, you’ll need to prepare for when and if the baby decides to come early. But how will you know if that happens?
Whether you’re making an adoption plan, or you’re ready for parenthood, here are the signs that you’re about to go into labor:
- Contractions will begin to get stronger the longer they last
- Your contractions don’t ease or go away, even if you change positions
- You have a sudden urge to start nesting
- Your water breaks
It’s very common, however, for women to think that they’re in labor when it’s actually a false alarm. These false labor pains are also known as Braxton Hicks contractions. Here are some signs that mean you might have to wait a little bit longer until you meet your baby:
- Your contractions vary in length and intensity
- The labor isn’t progressing
- No evidence of blood or mucous discharge
If you think that you might be in labor, don’t be afraid to call your doctor. It’s much better to be safe than sorry.
Prepare for the Big Day
We know that you’ve got a lot to think about before the baby gets here. Just remember that there are no right or wrong answers. Whatever you decide to do, make sure it’s something that you want, not what someone else wants. If you have any questions about your unplanned pregnancy options, please contact an adoption professional.